I hate grocery shopping. I always have, and frankly, I'm convinced I always will. Last night, at my downtown Smith's Marketplace, was especially loathesome, because:
#5: It was ridiculously crowded for a Wednesday evening. That in itself is cause enough to hate the grocery store, but last night, that was just the tip of the iceberg. And, because it was crowded, I wanted to get out of there, so I forgot to get the body wash I went in there specifically for. Which leads me to...
#4: I went back in to get the body wash and there were not nearly enough checkers for how busy it was; and no matter how many self-check stations they have, there are never enough of those either! I just needed to get that one thing, and I didn't want to stand in line for another 10 minutes, so I just put it down, and walked out. I had to go across the street to Walgreen's. Grrr.
#3: The yucky couple who were shouting across the aisles to each other. He was standing in the potato chips, and she was in the cereal, and apparantly there was some concern about how much cereal they had in the house, and clearly the chips were too engrossing for him to leave, so they had their conversation at decibels inappropriate for anything other than a sporting event. Besides the fact, it was completely inane, and I felt like my IQ dropped several points just for hearing it.
#2: Just down from the cereal conversation debacle, I came across a really embarrassing display of failed flirting. I hate watching people flirt anyway, because it's awkward at the best of times. This was especially bad, though, because a.) the guy Girl #1 was trying to flirt with was obviously gay, and b.) the guy was with another girl who was obviously friends with Girl #1. Um....hello? Why would you flirt (or try to) with a guy a girlfriend introduces you to? What if they are together? That's just a bitchy thing to do. Plus, Girl #1 needs her gaydar tuned, 'cause, wow; it shouldn't have been hard to tell... This whole thing just made me uncomfortable and pissed -- I don't want to see crap like that while I'm buying peanut butter!
#1: Every other person in the damn store smelled like patchouli! This is not that big a deal, really, and I know that, but I HATE patchouli, especially when I can smell it everywhere. Plus, for those who don't know, I have the dual blessing/curse of an insane sense of smell. I nearly passed out after I passed one guy in particular (who was then everywhere, of course); he smelled like he had bathed in it -- which maybe he had. And, honestly, that's his business, until it gives me a headache; then it pisses me off.
So, I left Smith's feeling uncomfortable, stupid, and headachy, knowing I was going to have to make another stop for stupid soap, which has inspired me to make enough money someday to hire people to do that for me.