1.06.2010

Second-Rate Superhero

Superheroes have arch-enemies (think Superman and Lex Luther, Batman and the Joker). The forces of Good are always opposed by the forces of Evil (Frodo vs. Sauron, Harry Potter vs. Lord Voldemort). We who are mere mortals will always have someone we just don't get along with; I prefer to refer to this person as a nemesis (it sounds more significant, right?). I think everyone should have a nemesis; it balances us out.

My current nemesis is a woman at work. We are as polar opposite as two people could possibly be, which wouldn't be a bad thing, except that she simply cannot see my point of view. Ever. I generally know where she is coming from, even if I rarely understand it. The difficulty comes from the fact that I am in a supervisory position, and I am the department trainer, which means I'm usually telling her what to do. It doesn't go over well. She cries, I get frustrated, she "tattles on me" to my boss, I defend myself. We never come to a consensus, or get any actual work done.

This would not be all that problematic -- or different from thousands of other awkward work situations -- if it were not for the added complication that this woman is crazy. Seriously. She suffers under some MAJOR delusions, and has very little actual grip on reality. She may or may not hear voices, I don't know. (I'm serious.) She wonders why I can't "just be nice to her." Her version of nice -- that I never offer feedback, suggestions, or anything that isn't rainbow-tinted rays of sunshine, as I constantly build and uplift and tell her what a marvelous human being she is, all while praising the (mediocre - my word) work that she does -- differs distinctly from my version of nice. Besides, nice has nothing to do with it. I'm just doing my job.

It's exhausting. And yes, I know that Lex Luther and the Joker and Voldemort are crazy, but they are crazy + evil genius. MY nemesis is crazy + tears - genius + delusion - money and/or explosive devices and/or magic. I'll never get my cape at this rate...

2 comments:

The Rookie said...

My nemeses usually come in adolescent form. Or in calorically delicious morsels that stare at me whilst I fail at any current diet.

I say you give her an annoying pet name and start calling her by it to her face. Play with her hair one day. Act like your best friends, screw with her head a little, you know.

Or you could always sign her up for gratuitous amounts of junk mail. Or maybe just steal her favorite pen or hide paperwork in her desk. Little annoyances that can entertain you to no end.

Yes, I've been watching too much of The Office because I'm in love with Jim Halpert (and Rainn Wilson).

By the way: my long comment is only evidence that we need to hang out.

Stephanie said...

Junk mail... Hmmm, how delightfully evil.

Yes, please, let's hang out soon. I was just thinking yesterday that we needed to get together...